The Mall

When I was a kid my parents would take my sister's and I to the mall, dinner and a movie about twice a year. It was a big deal and we each had five dollars we could spend, but the toy store was the last place we would stop otherwise we would want to go straight home and play with our toys (best thing I ever bought was a plastic green house that came with a gardening book). I guess this is the type of special outing you do when you have three daughters and a limited budget; it's like training or something.

Any way it was really fun and special except that we were always there when the mall started to close. I can still here that female voice "Attention Customers The Mall Will Be Closing in Fifteen Minutes." when I heard that I freaked. I wanted us to drop what ever it was we were eating, browsing, buying and run (not walk) out of the mall.  My stomach would be in knots until we were safe in our car. My mom always looked amused and I still remember her saying "they are not going to lock us in here, and if they did wouldn't that be fun?" No. That would not be fun.

All this back story just so you can understand this dream I had last night. I was running through this very huge fancy Sears being chased by Tracy Morgan (why couldn't it have been Jason Stathum?) trying to get out of the store before it closed for the night. My Grandma once told me that in her dreams she can run so fast and never get tired; that is so cool, in my dreams I always feel like I'm running through jell-o it's awful. I did notice, as I was racing through kitchen-wares, that they had the most beautifully green-blue and melon colored shake makers I'd ever seen.  I woke up as I was sticking my leg through the first set of outside doors and could see the lady (smiling, I might add) locking the second set.

The End.

for those of you who don't know
this is Tracy Morgan from SNL.

This is Jason Stathum.
He has really nice muscles.

What a Souper Day!

Today was one of those wonderful rare days where you feel warm and cozy and you don't have to go anywhere.  Thursday is my favorite day of the week because that is Brian's day off and I love having him at home with me. It's not like we spend every waking minute together it's just that I love knowing that he's here, like his presence somehow makes me feel happy, calm and peaceful.  Couple that with the huge quiet snowflakes tumbling past my window and my very wise decision to stay in my pajamas/work out clothes and you have a recipe for the perfect kind of cozy day. I made soup, home made bread pudding talked to my baby sister on the phone and sewed.   The only thing that could have made the day better would be a fire place in my living room but we have to have some goals for our futures.

Speaking of recipes I made bean soup today.  Soup is one of my favorite things to make because there's about a million variations, you get to chop stuff and drop it in the dutch oven (mine is red and pretty) and leave it on the stove all day until your ready to eat. A tiny bit of work yields a huge amount of food that's ready whenever you are.  I have blogged about my bean soup recipe before but today I thought I'd give some extra step by step pictures.

First heat a little oil in your pot and chop an onion (drop it in) then chop a bunch of celery (include the leaves they add a crazy amount of good flavor) and then any other veggies you have laying around. I happened to have carrots today, but you could also add peas or beans (see, that's why soup is so amazing I would not be surprised to find out that soup comes from the latin word for "clean out your fridge").  Stir them around add some salt and pepper and let them sweat a bit.  At this point you want to add your ham I just buy the diced packages you can find by the pre-packaged lunch meets; it's very economical.

Next add the beans. I insist for good bean soup that you have to use Randall Beans The Northern Bean Variety. If you don't use Randall beans the Soup Police will come and arrest you! (Sorry, I'm in a mood today).  Randall Beans are already seasoned or something and you add the juice and every thing just dump it in. I may or may  not have lots of relatives that work for Randall Beans in Tekonsha Michigan "the small Town with the big Fart." Oops, there I go again, geesh! They are the best for bean soup, though, even if I am biased you'll just have to trust me.

Next add chicken stock (stock is better then broth, it's richer and has more flavor) until every thing is just covered add a little more pepper put a lid on it and let it simmer on low all day until your ready to eat. Enjoy the wonderful aromas and feel a sense of pride that dinner is done. Now, go read a book or take a bath but do NOT do the laundry your husband told me that he wanted to do it.

It's not the prettiest most glamorous soup
but it is GOOD and hearty.The perfect thing for a snowy day.

I Have A Secret.

I do indeed.  You see I am a HUGE dork. Most of you know this but some are happily unaware that there neighbor/friend/relative/co-server is a huge giant uncoordinated nerd. You see I am good at hiding it... sort of.  I wear semi-normal clothes, I have great wonderful normal friends, I leave my house, I bathe regularly, I can carry on pretty decent conversations and I do not know how to program any thing with buttons. Because of those things I am able to hide behind a seemingly normal facade and go about my business interacting with people in a pretty normal way.

But here's the problem. When you are a dork eventually it will begin to ooze out of you. It's not even that your trying to hide it; it's more like you forgot that you were a nerd because those around you are normal, ergo, you began to think of yourself as normal. However, eventually something will happen and it will begin to creep out of you wounding innocent bystanders.

No really people around me can get hurt. You see Brian and I have become quite close to our neighbors. They're super fun and nice and have a little girl Conner's age. Plus she's a stay-at-home mom which means we can visit during the day and partake of adult conversation while the chaos rages around us.  Last week her and I were carpooling to a crocheting event (o.k., I know that sounds a little dorky any way) I stepped into her entry way with my new Converses which have no traction took a step toward there daughter slipped slid across the floor landed on my butt with a very heavy very un-lady like thump in front of them both and knocked the 18 month old down in the process.  "Sigh" they now know what I truly am.

I one time caught myself singing through a menu in front of a church friend (you know something like "eggs and toast or do I want an pancakes?" to the tune of some random nineties ballad). That's when she found out. Sometimes I forget to hide my fantasy novels or turn off my Greatest Disney Hits CD when I stop to pick some one up in my van.  It can happen in so many different ways.

You know? The most amazing thing about the leaking of nerdiness is, despite people eventually finding out my true nature, they usually still hang out with me, love me, marry me (well just one time did the marrying thing happen), and befriend me. I guess we should just accept that God made us individual and unique and while I won't ever figure out how to properly apply makeup I am really good at making four year olds laugh so I guess it's all good.

Memories From Childhood.

Isn't this cool?

My uncle Carl made this for me for my ninth or tenth birthday. It was commissioned paid for by my Grammy.  Think back to when you were nine or ten, what little girl isn't obsessed with horses at this age? All I could think about were horses and riding lessons (which I never took).  I had been collecting horses for a while and I guess my Grammy thought they needed a home.  Did you notice all the tiny individual floor boards? The roof has shingles, each stall has a window and a door that opens and closes! You could not ever find something this cool at a toy store.

Most of the horses are from when I was a girl, one was added by my sister Heather when she was nine, one has lost it's saddle and this one here in the front "Santa" gave Hunter in his stocking, it's old from an antique shop in Marshall.

While I have countless memories of these super cool toys I have one in particular that I keep thinking about. We lived in the Upper Peninsula and I took them outside in the winter and made this huge elaborate tunnel and bridge system for them to travel in. It was so cool and complex I didn't come inside until my legs were completely numb.

They live on top of Hunter's book shelf now.  He and Maddie had to wait until he turned four to play with them so you can imagine the excitement that surrounds them. They only play with them at the table under supervision because I know, from experience, how easily these horses lose legs and hoofs. But some day it will be completely he and Conner's and it makes me so grateful that I have something like this I can pass down because they are less then enthused about my one-of-a-kind doll house, and I already sold my American Girl collection; but horses, they'll play with. Thank you Grammy thank you uncle Carl for loving me so much that you would make me something this unique this awesome.

Happy New Year!

Christmas was a blast and also very crazy. I know it seemed weird and strange for my sisters who are feeling the grown-up blues this year but for us it was so fun and magical. This was the first year that Hunter had a frame of reference for what Christmas was. He was so excited for months and every thing was exciting. It sort of brings back some of those feelings of when you were a kid. How awesome that we get to re-live some of those things through our children!

That coupled with the fact that I crocheted two stuffed animals, four pairs of gloves, seven scarves, embroidered two pillow cases, played my trumpet in the church cantata and kept up with all the fun baking and shopping etc. made for a busy holiday. Surprisingly it wasn't that stressful which is just wonderful. I think having two boys so into it this year helped keep it all in perspective.

I went out to mom's and when I came home I just looked around and thought "blah Christmas needs to come down." which is strange for me I usually leave it up until well into January but it just felt like a new year a new look in my home. And while I have gotten rid of some stuff and am in the midst of hanging new picture arrangements it's not as different as I would like. I don't know, I may paint the walls... Time for a change any way.

this barn is just like the one my Grammy had for us while we were young. I found it an an antique shop (how old am I again?) and after such a struggle thinking what to get Conner it turned out to be a perfect choice; he loves it.

Well I hope your holidays were great and I hope your 2011 finds you doing really well. Enjoy the pics of the boys and some of my handi-work (why didn't I take more pics of the stuff I made for postereity? Oh well.)

I made these using Alicia Paulson's book on embroidery for my grandparents whom are always difficult to buy for. They turned out very well and I was pleased with them. I cross stiched right onto pillow cases I bought from TJ Max

This little guy was made for my nephew who's nursery is an ocean theme. He's too little to care buy his mom  loved it!

Sometimes small things happen that make you realize just how well God knows you.

Well maybe I should begin at the beginning. Not the beginning of time that would take forever or the beginning of me that is starting to get too long but the beginning of my adult hood, relationship with Brian and ministry.

Some of you know this story, I honestly can't remember exactly who I tell what to (think how great this is going to be when I get beginning stages alzemiers) and I'll try to make it brief. I ended up going to GLCC because I didn't "feel" God leading me any where and I knew people who went there and had a potential room mate who was both nice and clean. It took me two years before I even declared a major because I didn't know what to do. I also started dating this really cute boy with deep brown eyes and wonderful wavy hair, he was going to be a minister. I did not want to be a minister's wife in any way shape or form (especially hair shape, big and poofy). Even at nineteen years old I was wise enough to understand that you can't marry some one with out also marrying their calling from God. To try and pull them away from that only leads to bitterness, resentment, and hurt. So I had a decision, marry the man I love and embrace his work as my own (for those of you who don't know if you are in professional ministry it permeates every thing and it is a family affair even if only one person's name is on the paycheck) or move on pursue my goals and dreams even though I wasn't sure what those were. So pretty much God and I fought about it for a year (and I didn't get my way imagine that).

Finally my desire to be with Brian for the rest of my life, coupled with the fact that I was beginning to love the Bible in a whole new way led me to say "fine God, I trust you; I trust that you know best I will make this sacrifice for you." (feel free to insert early adult hood dramatic martyrdom into that "sacrifice for you bit").  Almost immediately after marrying Brian God began to show me how much I loved ministry, how cool it is, how neat teen agers are (the worst possible kind of ministry I thought at the time was youth). Those early years taught me so much about God's bride, the church. Even in the times where we were experiencing hurt beyond understanding (in our first full time ministry we didn't go a single year without losing at least one child or teen ager in an automobile accident) I could feel God at work I could see his hand moving. I learned about faith, provision, guidance, I learned that small town super "old school" congregants can still love the Lord and their communities even if they don't like women serving communion or electric guitars.

Very quickly I came to realize that God knew so much better then I did about what would make me happy and what I was meant to do. It wasn't being a world class musician, or author or FBI profiler, it was ministry. All kinds but especially youth ministry. I know with out a doubt that I am a very lucky person I get to do what I love when I want to and I get to do it standing right beside my husband. Not very many people can say that. If I suddenly feel God is pushing me to help lead a women's bible study I can, if I want to take a group of girls on a jewelry making excursion, I get to it's not weird at all because of Brian's Job title. I get to be involved with a group of people who because of their age are changing and maturing so fast. I can to see someone go from dolls to disciple almost over night. I get to have a real impact and influence on young women and that to me is one of the most incredible things God has allowed me to do. I don't just like it I LOVE it!!!

Sometimes, many times I don't know who's growing and being ministered to more, me or them. And I suppose it doesn't really matter. All I have to do is open up my latte machine and home and I get to be part of people's lives; It totally rocks. I have always loved doing what we're doing but lately it has been even better. I can't exactly put my finger on why, I'm sure it has a lot to do with a lot of things (I'm getting more sleep now for one) but the group of kids we have right now are just so cool. These high school girls in my coffee club are so sweet, polite and mature. They really care about each other regardless of school affiliation which is something that prior groups have struggled with. Things are so good right now I sometimes catch myself waiting for the other shoe to drop (sorry God but you know my human tendencies toward disaster thinking). I also love it so much that I sometimes catch myself wondering if the girls really like it too, I mean if coffee club and hanging out is actually something they want to do or something they feel obligated to do...

Well last night at our youth group Christmas party the other shoe did drop. Literally my coffee girls went in together all on their own and bought me a pair of Converse All Star high tops, in red. I have wanted a pair since Jr. High (you may remember my Christmas list post). They also got me an ornament shaped like a cappuccino machine and a super fun coffee dish towel. Now I would love them no matter what, and I haven't been feeling stressed about them but that gift really meant something to me. It was like they were saying "we love you too, and we like being around you." It was as if God was in on the gift sort of like a confirmation that I'm doing the right thing (we all need those now and then).  It's hard to explain but it's only a few years and this group will be gone we'll have a new one and I know that they'll all be special in their way but to be part of this little group right now... I'm not sure it will get any better. It truly is a blessing and an honor to be part of their lives.

And I love the shoes, I've got them on right now. Thank you Allie, Chelsea, Danielle, and Mary you girls are a bright spot in my week and a joy in my heart.

The Last Vestiges of a Breakfast Table Can Tell You A Lot About a Family...

For example why are there any vestiges at all? Because on days when we must get older child to school the table does not get cleared. I realize I should wake up ten minutes earlier so that I can clear the table but I don't live in a state where cock roaches immediately descend upon a plate of food so I figure I have at least a day to get to the cereal encrusted bowl. Therefore I will sleep in as late as possible, screw having a clean table (until I get home and have to clear it in order to put lunch on it then it's grumble grumble grumble).

Why is there a giant sports bottle with Thomas the Train on it? Well that one is easy my children are boys so our sports bottles have trains and cars instead of princesses (sigh).


Why is there a shark at the table? Do we frequently consume shark as a breakfast protein? Was he simply a guest who was left behind, or did he come later to eat our left overs? The answer to that question is a bit more complicated. No, I do not serve beanie baby sharks for breakfast, but I do find them under my bed when I go to clean under there for the first time in four years (let me just interject a "holy smokes"! If I were a mad scientist I could have made an army of fur beings from what I found under there.) Some one gave me a box of little stuffed animals and I put them under the bed, who knows when, to use as Christmas and birthday presents for random children and promptly forgot they were there. I have been bribing Hunter into dressing himself. Which is a difficult and funny thing he usually gets a quarter every time he can accomplish it with minimal help and no whining. I figure it's only two dollars a week which is a good allowance for him right now. But the day I cleaned under my bed I let him pick out one of the very dusty never-before-played-with-animals and that is what he chose. Sharky is now a very important part of our lives partly because of the book "Shark vs. Train" (no this is not a sci-fi channel movie) and partly because he earned it himself and is very proud of both Sharky and the fact that he can put on his own clothes.  I am also very happy that he can put on his own clothes...

usually; it is November after all and I'm pretty sure his underwear are on backwards.